Episode Transcript
[00:00:08] Speaker A: We're in an old dead of a kitchen, and when you're here, it's gonna be to live in the sand.
[00:00:25] Speaker B: Karen, how you doing today?
[00:00:27] Speaker A: I'm good. How are you?
[00:00:29] Speaker B: I'm doing very well. Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the pod.
It's wonderful to be connected here once again, discussing senior care and dementia and all that wonderful stuff.
[00:00:44] Speaker A: That wonderful stuff.
[00:00:45] Speaker B: Isn't it wonderful stuff?
Trying to keep it light. It's a heavy topic that we try to keep light. That's one of our guiding principles. And dare I say, I think we do an amazing job at that.
[00:00:55] Speaker A: I mean, let's compliment ourselves and each other on what I think is actually pretty momentous. This is episode 10 of the pod.
[00:01:09] Speaker B: You studied some statistics, I believe, that.
[00:01:11] Speaker C: Says that most podcasts don't make it.
[00:01:14] Speaker B: To 10, and once you have, it's.
[00:01:15] Speaker C: Like a big deal.
[00:01:16] Speaker A: Most new podcasts don't make it to three.
[00:01:19] Speaker B: Ooh, really interesting.
[00:01:21] Speaker A: I know. So we probably should have celebrated four as a milestone, but 10, that. That's a big number. I'm excited about it.
[00:01:28] Speaker B: That feels it's important and it's an accomplishment in its own right. And dare I say, I don't think we're gonna stop at 10. I think we're gonna keep going.
[00:01:38] Speaker A: Well, we have to, because we've already conducted interviews for 11 and 12 with 13 on the way.
But, yeah, I think maybe we do kind of a big to do at every 10. So let's celebrate again at 20, which is probably around the corner. So thanks to all of our listeners who have propelled us, and also, yes, the subject matter which has to be discussed, it's really vital. And the fact that we are able to do so one with each other, but also with members of our community is really helpful in terms of finding our way through this journey, which is heartwarming and challenging all at the same time. So with that said, why don't we intro our guest for today? I'll let you do the honors.
[00:02:28] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:02:29] Speaker B: We have a very special guest today that will be coming on in a minute. Her name is Sherilyn Rowe, and she is the activities director. I think she'll tell you her exact title, but she basically runs the operations at this incredible adult daycare center for those dealing with dementia. It's this place called the Brown center, and it is in suburban Detroit. It's located in this complex that houses a lot of Jewish organizations and facilities. The Jewish Community center is out there.
There is Heckman, which is an independent living apartment complex there. That's where Sheila lives. Snarky Sheila, who now getting a lot.
[00:03:11] Speaker A: Of lot of good accolades from our listeners. Everybody seemed to really enjoy listening to Sheila's snarkiness.
[00:03:19] Speaker B: She is a kick, to say the least. Also, there is Danta, which is a rehab facility, and there's Fleischman, which houses both assisted living and memory care. And that's where Howard's dad was, by the way. You guys, I'm sure remember our heartwarming episode with Howard talking about his situation, dealing with his own health stuff, and then also having to deal with his dad, who was being a very challenging guest at Fleischman. And we do want to report sad news that Howard's dad did pass away recently. So we just want to send our wishes to the family and everybody who's affected by that. And Howard especially, he's, of course, a trooper, and he's dealing with it as best he can along with his two brothers. But we are sad about that.
And I know he'll always take with him those what he called blessed moments in the end, which, again, we were just, I don't know, I guess, surprised to hear how he thought it was a blessing, that tough work that he had to do. And it was. And it's great that he'll always have that. And he had that special time with him before the end.
[00:04:30] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:04:31] Speaker A: I just would like to add in that when I reflect on Howard's positivity and how he jumped in in such a massive way to take care of his dad, it does remind me that what we're doing here is challenging work, and it can be exhausting physically and emotionally. But in the end, I hope that people who are in the situation that Howard was in, that you and I are in, that Julie's in, that we can reflect at the end and know that we are doing the right things for our loved ones. And this give back almost feels like sometimes really overwhelming, but also proud. And I hope that Howard, I know he will always feel proud of the way that he took care of his dad and reminds all of us that what we're doing here comes from the heart, and we're glad that we're doing it.
[00:05:22] Speaker B: And speaking of coming from the heart, Sherilyn is someone who really is made for this work that she's doing, and we can't wait to talk to her about what goes on at the Brown Center. And first, we just thought we'd tell you what our mom's experience was. So you have a little background. The Brown center is this amazing place. It's Basically, an adult daycare facility.
And guests spend two or three afternoons a week, from three to four hours at a time at this place. And it's everything you would imagine. They have meals, they have activities, they do artwork, they have chair yoga, all sorts of stuff that Sherylyn will get into.
And we found out about it when we were making that decision to take mom out of her assisted living facility and move her back home. Of course, one of our challenges was, okay, how do we create some of these wonderful regimented activities? And the schedule that they had at the place, which was so great. And so one of the things we found was the Brown Center. We're like, oh, this is perfect. Let's have her go there a couple afternoons a week. I can get a break. She can get some structured activity. Sounds perfect. And we were fortunate that we found a spot on the days that were best for her to go there. And so she went there for a month. And initially, we thought this place was going to be perfect, and she had an initial positive reaction to. To the whole thing. And then over time, things started to. I mean, the place is amazing, but for some reason, mom just didn't love it. And I don't know, Karen, if you want to get into a little bit of why I think that is.
[00:06:51] Speaker A: Well, it was interesting that, first of all, we started by having this cognitive test. Sherrilyn conducted this with us. We brought mom in.
You and I had already filled out a survey before mom began. And then we brought mom in for the cognitive test to see if she was even eligible for services. And I think we were pretty shocked by.
[00:07:11] Speaker C: By.
[00:07:14] Speaker A: Her inability to answer really basic questions like what the date was, or, sadly for us, the name of her husband to whom she was married for, what, almost 60 years? Happily, joyfully.
And there were a lot of just different pieces that started coming up in this cognitive test that made us really realize that she. She's really moving through the phases of dementia. So that in itself was shocking. But despite that, she qualified. Obviously, they have different, you know, levels of dementia that they service, but it ended up turning out to be a good fit for her in terms of where she was cognitively. I think for mom, one of the biggest issues that we also noticed just in assisted living.
[00:07:59] Speaker B: Let me jump in there really, really quickly. Just about the cognitive test, what was also shocking or surprising was, was when she was not able to answer a lot of those basic questions, for a second, I thought they might say, well, she's too far gone. We can't take her here.
But Ended up being. She was kind of middle of the road. Like, that's the type of guests that they have there. That's what the disease is. And they were totally ready to handle her.
[00:08:23] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, to us, we were. I should. You're right. That's a good point. To us, it felt shocking. To them, it felt like, yeah, this is the process of the disease, and we have a space for her here, and we're gonna find a group that suits her needs. And they did all of those things to the best of their ability. For mom, one of her biggest issues has always been that she's never really been a joiner. She doesn't love group activities.
I think the social aspect for her was hard. She's sitting at a table with people she doesn't know. She's doing projects that, you know, she's never been overly excited. I remember when I was a kid, and I was constantly involved in every single artistic activity there could possibly be. And if there was an activity to do, I was joining, and she would have to take me to 8 million things. And often the moms would be gathering as well. And mom wanted nothing to do with any of that. If I can really be honest. Our niece Madeline, jokes all the time about how Nana wasn't always really a big fan of other women. She. She was sort of competitive in terms of, like, you know, that she didn't have a huge array of close female friends, though she did have a few, you know, lifelong friends and certainly cousins, et cetera. But she often sort of looked at herself as, like, well, you know, I mean, those women are jealous of me. Or those women can tell that their husbands are looking at me. I mean, she said this way well into the point where it was very clear that those husbands not only weren't looking at her, but probably couldn't look at her even if they wanted to. And so I think that part of that was just mom's nature kind of was shining through in that way. But also, I think that she was really having a hard time just being a part of any kind of group, you know, engaging in conversation, even on a limited basis. And so as a result, you kind of experienced more than I did. You know, her lack of interest in going to the Brown center, which, to us, was a shame, because for her and for probably every participant I've talked to, it's a game changer for them in terms of helping the caregiver, but also really engaging their loved ones. And so while we felt disappointed that it wasn't a match for mom, we still will speak of their, you know, this wonderful program a thousand times over, which is why we decided to feature them on the pod today.
[00:10:44] Speaker B: Yeah, I would drive her up there, and once we made the turn in, and she'd realize where we were going, oftentimes she'd give this, like, ugh, this again, Like. And I just was baffled because. And then I'd get her in there, and I'm like, mom, give it a try. And then I'd pick her up. And sometimes she would say, finally, you know, I arrived to pick her up. But other times, she'd be like, yeah, it was pretty good today. But, yeah, I think generally, for some of the reasons we'll never know, like, there's. We can only guess as to why. But I just want to say if.
[00:11:13] Speaker A: If it was me, I would have been really excited to go in there sitting with a group of strangers, chat them up, make new friends, do art projects. There's yoga, singing, listening to music. I mean, what more could you ask for? But, you know, sometimes when it comes to activities, they're not for everyone. But this one is for most people. And so I think this is a good time to bring in Sherilyn and share all of the joys of what the Brown center has to offer.
[00:11:39] Speaker B: Well, and also, you know, it's worth reminding that if it's not one thing, it's Joanna. And that's part of the reason that it remains an enigma and a mystery. Okay, we're going to be right back with Sherilyn. In the meantime, here's mom.
[00:12:00] Speaker A: Put a happy face, and everybody's gonna be in this beautiful moon in the sun here.
And we are back with Sheryl and Rowe of the Brown Center. It's great to see you.
[00:12:23] Speaker D: Oh, thanks.
Good to see you both.
[00:12:26] Speaker A: We really appreciate you joining us. We are just. We can't say enough about how wonderful we think the Brown center is. So we just wanted today to talk about. What we're really focusing on is activities for seniors that we can utilize within the community to keep our seniors busy, active, engaged.
And so, of course, we came to you immediately because you were one of our favorites. So, first of all, can you just give us some background on the Brown Center? Tell us what it is, what your role is, et cetera?
[00:12:57] Speaker D: So I am the social worker at the Brown Center. So it's the Dorothy and Peter Brown Jewish Community Adult Day program.
So the background. We've been in the community for about 25 years, so it's pretty. It's a staple in A way. So. And it's still kind of like a hidden gem at the same time because there's so many families that don't know about us. Us.
[00:13:17] Speaker A: But we're going to change that right now, for better or worse.
[00:13:21] Speaker D: Okay, thank you. So we've been in the community for about 25 years and we are dementia specific. So we provide cognitive stimulation as well as some physical activity for people living with dementia and we provide that respite for their family members. So those caregivers, we, we make sure to include them also.
[00:13:42] Speaker B: And so Cherylin, this is basically set up as kind of like the way.
[00:13:46] Speaker C: We looked at it was kind of an adult daycare place. I know when mom tried it out for a month, she was there, I think four, three or four hours a day, couple times a week. And that's just kind of to give a special place that they can go for an activity and obviously give the family some relief and. But it's temporary. It's like a day place that they leave. Right. They don't know. There's no overnight stay or anything like that.
[00:14:11] Speaker D: Correct? Yes. So we do operate Monday through Friday, 9am to 5.
And we do have a, like a minimum requirement of two days a week, three hours per day. And that's because of the routine that we want to build for people. So if they come on a Monday and they don't come back until another Monday, it's like a new experience all over for them. So we want to kind of give them that sense of purpose and that routine in their life.
[00:14:36] Speaker C: And so when someone's considering whether the Brown center is right for them or for their loved one, why would someone be a good fit for the Brown Center?
[00:14:46] Speaker D: Why would it. So we want to make sure that anyone who wants to maximize their abilities, the Brown center would still be a great place for them. Because when you're living, we focus on a, we take a positive approach to care and we focus on what our participants can do versus what they cannot do. So we don't focus on those limitations. So when they're hearing program, they don't know. Okay, maybe I'm hard of hearing or maybe my memories impaired. They don't know that because that's not what we focus on. We make it conducive to them. So anyone wanting to maximize their current abilities, that will be. This is a great place for them because we're going to go ahead.
[00:15:29] Speaker C: That's restricted, not restricted. But is that mainly for people for aging loved ones with dementia or is it a more of a Broad category of someone who needs kind of help with their attention and activities and who is diminished. How would you describe like the. The median of the state of mental acuity that your residents have?
[00:15:52] Speaker D: So everyone here does have a diagnosis of dementia or some sort of memory impairment. So there are some people who have dementias or Alzheimer's disease specifically. They might have vascular dementia, they might have frontal temporal different. But everyone here does have dementia. So we are dementia specific.
[00:16:11] Speaker C: Got it. And so what's the process that someone goes through if they want to be there? I know when we were checking it out, there were a couple interviews and then we had this cognitive test, I guess, or interview that you had given mom, which was pretty illuminating for us exactly how diminished her mental acuities had become. Like, what is the process? And do you do some type of interview that says, yes, this is right for them or no, this is not right for them?
[00:16:41] Speaker D: We do. So we try to get to know them before they come.
So we start usually like with the tour. I think you came for a tour, Andrew and Karen. So you guys came for that tour. That's usually how we start that.
And I do encourage the tour just so you can kind of get an idea of where your loved one is going to be. From there, we do an in office assessment and that is free of charge. So you bring your family member in for about an hour and a half. And we will do the mini mental state exam that you kind of referenced, Andrew. It's like the one that they do in a doctor's office. So name of the current day or time or whatever it might be, something like that.
And from there we will have them spend a little time in program, maybe 20, 30 minutes just to see how they engage, how they like it.
And we also of course, have paperwork for the family.
And after that we can kind of pick that start date. So we do the mini mental state exam just to gauge where they're at. And then from the assessment, I'm going to write an assessment summary and I'm going to give that to our staff. So that way it's not like a new experience for the love for your loved one. When they come to the Brown program, it's more so like they're going to feel like we know them because we kind of do. Because I put all the information in the summary and I give it to staff and they, they look over it and they make sure now we have redirection tools. We know we can talk about their grandchildren or their pets or they like to play the Piano like Joanna. Like that's what we do.
[00:18:10] Speaker C: And so once they're in and it's. It's a pretty. A beautiful, wide open group setting. Are there any separation of certain activities for certain people or based on their levels of dementia or is it basically kind of a one size fits all? Because everybody's kind of in that general category together.
[00:18:28] Speaker D: So it's a, it's a group participation. So although we have various levels of the decline or cognitive impairment, we don't separate anyone. Our program is designed to where it will include everyone, regardless of their.
Where they're at. So for instance, we might have more challenging questions in trivia, but then we might have some that may be a little bit. That someone, anyone would know easily.
So we kind of have that.
What do you call it? Like a. We have that mix so that everyone can participate together.
[00:19:02] Speaker A: Do you have. Oh, sorry, go ahead.
[00:19:04] Speaker C: Sorry. I'm just going to ask for like, for our mom, you know, when we were going through that test and there, I mean, it wasn't shocking, but it was very illuminating.
You know, she couldn't. Things like she couldn't remember the name of her husband. She couldn't really recall like the actual dates today. And one of my first reactions was like, wow, like, maybe she's too far gone for this place. But I remember you said something to me like she, she was kind of in the middle range of the level of dimension that you have. So I guess you're very used to that. That's the disease and that's the level of brain power that people have there, right?
[00:19:40] Speaker D: Absolutely. So we've seen like very progressed. We've seen very early stages. We've seen that middle ground.
And we are trained, we know how to navigate all of that.
[00:19:52] Speaker A: And so I would imagine that it is rare that you would have to actually say no to a family member, that somebody doesn't qualify for the brown side.
[00:20:02] Speaker D: It is rare. I mean, it can happen. So if someone. We do have a ratio of four to one. So that is the program participants, we have four to one staff members. So if someone requires one to one, we do still have alternatives. You can come with a private caregiver and still attend program, but if that's not available or that maybe that's something the family does not want to do, then if someone does require one to one or they some sort of safety risk, let's say someone's a fall risk and they don't use a wheelchair at all, but they need one, then something like that might make us say Maybe not right now, but maybe we can work toward getting them in program some kind of way.
[00:20:46] Speaker A: And so what kinds of activities do you offer?
[00:20:50] Speaker D: So we offer a wide variety of activities. So music is like a huge part of our program.
So we have about five different.
[00:20:58] Speaker C: For those of you not watching video, Sherrilyn's face just lit up with a big smile as she was starting to talk about the activities, which are amazing.
[00:21:06] Speaker D: Because everyone loves the activities. Everyone's favorite, for the most part, is the music. I mean, who doesn't like music? A live performance, someone might come in and play the saxophone, the piano, the guitar, the violin. So music is a huge part, but we do also do trivia. So those cognitively stimulating activities.
So we have a family room and a big screen tv. So that's where we lead the group activity. So the program staff will lead that on the big screen. That way everyone can participate together. So it might be Family Feud. Everyone loves Family Feud. It might be trivia. We might travel to Spain on YouTube. So we have a variety of different things. And then there's also the physical activity, so we make sure to incorporate that. But it's still based on what our participants can do.
So we have chair yoga, gentle stretching, chair aerobics, something that everyone can participate. We have.
[00:22:00] Speaker A: I do remember my mom came home with the most delightful art projects that are still hanging up.
[00:22:07] Speaker D: We do have an art therapist, and it's like a therapeutic art session. So, I mean, it's really good. It's a conversation. And you're beginning to be creative as well.
[00:22:17] Speaker A: And do you find that when participants are engaging in the projects, for instance, are they engaging with each other as well?
[00:22:28] Speaker D: Yes. And that's really good to see. So that's. I want to sit in. I really love to see that someone might help someone else or they might complement their picture or they may say, hey, I want to do that too. So now they want to do two pictures. Like, yes, they engage with staff, they engage with other participants.
[00:22:44] Speaker A: And you said that you have a 4 to 1 ratio. So 4 to 1 participants to one staff member.
What's a typical number of participants that you might have in a given day?
[00:22:55] Speaker D: So right now, our ratio, well, excuse me, our number is about 19.
So it might not necessarily be 19 people at one time, but throughout the day, since everyone does have a different time frame that they're here, maybe 11 to 4, 10 to 2, but about 19 people right now. But we do have the capacity for about 25 people when we're fully staffed.
[00:23:20] Speaker A: And is it Only for Jewish participants.
[00:23:23] Speaker D: No. So we're all inclusive. So everyone here is not Jewish.
And we do incorporate, like, things for everyone. So on Friday, we might have Shabbat for the Jewish community, but we also have an alternative activity for those that don't want to participate.
So we always make sure to include everyone.
[00:23:41] Speaker C: And one of those talking about the guests, working together and sitting together and having conversations together, interacting with each other. I think one of the things that our mom struggled with, and this is of course speculation, we could never really, I think, understand exactly why she didn't want to continue, but she has difficulty in, like, group conversations because she's not quite able to keep up. She's not able to interject, lead discussions. She's okay, kind of one on one.
And is there any way that you can help with that or do you have any tricks to the trade that can get someone more comfortable in that setting? Because I can understand if someone had a tough time having conversations with groups of people at a time in a group setting, it might be a little daunting for them to be there.
[00:24:32] Speaker D: Sure. So a lot of times we might have someone, maybe a staff member who's already in that program.
So a lot of times we have two people in one program, two staff members. So maybe one will sit next to someone who's kind of having a little trouble with the group conversation and encourage them or just kind of be there as a support or a comfort. So that way they're still available to help the rest of the participants, but they're kind of sitting with this one individual to kind of encourage them and offer that support.
[00:25:00] Speaker C: That's good.
And how is the Brown center funded? Like, how are you guys able to. I know, I know there's something that we had to pay, but it was a fraction of the total cost of what you're delivering. So it was a nominal.
[00:25:13] Speaker A: It was a nominal fee. I was really shocked by how inexpensive it was, and I just couldn't understand how you're able to have this incredible center and all of these staff members.
[00:25:25] Speaker D: So the Phil. The philanthropic support is what really keeps us alive. So that is what funds us.
So we have a lot of community donors that donate, and then also we're part of two different organizations. So there's Gesher Human Services, and that is where our Southfield location is at. And then there's the West Bloomfield through the Jewish Senior Life.
So that's how we're funded through all the donors for both sites. So it's really about the donations and that support that we get from the community that keeps us alive.
So the cost of our program is actually it's $20 an hour.
But the cost to run the program, I want to say it's around $48 an hour.
So through that support we can offer it at $20 an hour.
[00:26:16] Speaker A: That's incredible. I mean, it's. You can't find care for $20 an hour, let alone full on activities that people are. I mean, the supplies and the expertise of the people be completely blown away by what you offered and how affordable it was. I think that people would tend to shy away from something because they'd say, well, I can't afford this, or I'm already paying for care for a loved one. But the idea that you could bring a family member here and get these incredible services for that price is really.
That's unbelievable.
[00:26:51] Speaker D: It's amazing. The support that we get is absolutely amazing.
[00:26:55] Speaker C: And I know you guys have two locations.
Any plans for expansion? I mean, do you have to turn people away because you. I mean, I know we were lucky to get mom in when we got her in. I imagine you have challenges accommodating everybody who wants your services.
[00:27:10] Speaker D: So I don't know of any plans for expansion. And I will say sometimes we do have a wait list, and I think that was around the time when Joanna was coming. I think we had like a wait list or maybe we were almost getting there.
But sometimes we just have one, I want to say over the summer. But once we get that staffing, then another staff person, that means we can have four more participants. So it's really just based on the staff.
[00:27:36] Speaker C: Got it. And so what have you guys noticed as far as the positive impact on the people who come through the Brown Center? I mean, do you. Do you measure at all the progress or report to the families? Like since they've been here these last couple months, we've noticed this, this and this. I imagine there's maybe not necessarily progress because we're talking about a degenerative disease, but how do you measure the success of the activities and the programs that you do?
[00:28:02] Speaker D: So we do a couple things. We do have care plans, so we'll do a care plan every six months.
And so that's kind of like when we meet the families, we talk about the progress, we share that with them. Any concerns, any changes. And then we also do a participant and a family survey. So we will give you a survey during that time and we also give the participant one. So of course I will read it to participants and just kind of Have a conversation with them and ask them how they like it, what's going, you know, what they would like to see change.
And then also just through observation.
So some people, I might see them start out and they don't really look too enthused.
But then as time goes on, most people do adjust and they love it.
[00:28:48] Speaker C: And any advice for what caregivers with patients of dementia at home can do? Like that don't have. The Brown Center, I know we have, especially me, has this issue of, like, I notice myself having less conversations with mom because she's not as able to have a conversation with me. We bought some different board games designed for dementia. She's not as much into tv. She does play the piano, so we try to keep it busy. But like, any specific activities or advice you have for handling time with someone with dementia where you feel like, wow, I probably should be doing something, but we can't really have a conversation.
[00:29:29] Speaker D: So I guess there's a couple things I like to recommend that people go on YouTube and kind of like, for exercise, for example, you can find, you can find programs that are geared towards seniors for like chair. Chair yoga. Chair exercise is something that people can do right at home in their living, and it's just about kind of having that partnership with them to be. To kind of encourage them to do so. And then as far as that cognitive stimulation, we always recommend just to make it fun. So like a memory game or like, let's say you can't really have a conversation with Joanna anymore, but maybe you can get out those pictures and you can show her the photo album and she might say, hey, I remember that.
[00:30:10] Speaker C: Time where, yeah, we do do that. She loves the photo.
[00:30:13] Speaker A: She's obsessed with them. She walks around the house with photo albums and, and, and goes through them for hours on end, and it's really delightful.
[00:30:21] Speaker D: Good. Yep. So that's one of those things. It's different for everyone because everyone's dementia journey is different. So the pictures might work for Joanna. And then maybe I've seen the. The chair exercises work for someone. They're not really too engaged in other things. Maybe it's just nothing. But they love the exercise because that's what was a part of their life before. They. They like to do that. They like to walk, they like to run, whatever. It is.
[00:30:46] Speaker A: Amazing. So if somebody wants to donate to the Brown center, how do they go about doing that?
[00:30:53] Speaker D: So there's a couple ways they can call. They will be able to call on the phone and get information from our front desk, associate or they could send in a donation.
A lot of people call over the phone, but it's up to you. Some people want donations in. Just bring a check in the envelope, let us know what you're doing, and they can donate.
[00:31:13] Speaker C: And, Sherrilyn, want to get you out on this. Like, you are doing some incredible work. How do you take care of yourself? Like, do you ever get sad being around people with dementia? I know you said you're an empath, and you're just. Seems like your DNA is designed for this work, and maybe that gives you a lift, but, like, just something a little bit about yourself and how you deal with this kind of work that you're doing.
[00:31:37] Speaker D: So it can be sad at times, of course, to see people when you get to know them and how they used to. They were a doctor or they were a teacher or whatever it is, and now they're unable to do that. That. That is sad. But seeing them come alive in the program and the joy that they get and the respite for their family, that is what lifts me.
So as far as taking care of myself, I have learned to do the best that I can, and then that kind of helps me as far as any type of sadness or guilt. If I know I went to work every day and I've done the best that I can, then I kind of have to let the rest go. So I just show up every day and do my best.
[00:32:17] Speaker A: It's amazing. We were so beyond impressed with the program and couldn't believe that these resources were available for family members who are taking care of loved ones.
Keeping them busy, active, engaged, is really, I think, one of the greatest challenges, you know, not just having them sit in a chair doing nothing all day long. And so what you're providing is really a great lifeline. And you're right, not only for the participant, but for the family members as well. Knowing there are minimum of three hours during that time period where, you know, they're well cared for, they're engaged, they're active, they're doing something that is thoughtful and meaningful. And we're grateful for this program and for all of the work that you do to make that possible for the members of the community.
[00:33:07] Speaker D: Thank you.
So it's a great team here. It is a great team. There's Debbie Bonuni, who's our director, and so she does a wonderful job. She's the director from both sites. I don't know how she does that, but she does.
But we do keep in mind to take care of our caregivers.
So we do have a biannual day off for caregivers where they can come and enjoy the program. So they will go to the Seoul Cafe and they'll get a massage. There's lunch served. There's music there.
There's a lot of different activities for them. And they can choose to bring their loved one here to the Brown center from the hours of 10:30 or 10 to 3 and no charge that day.
Or they can choose to leave that person with maybe a family member. They can have fun with their family member while they just come out. So we make sure of that to take care of our caregivers as well as we do provide support group through the Alzheimer's Association. So we have a virtual, which I do facilitate that every fourth Thursday.
And then we have one that is in Southfield that our Southfield program coordinator facilitates and that's in purse.
[00:34:19] Speaker A: And so family members can come to these meetings just to get support and conversation with one another. Family members who are caregivers.
[00:34:28] Speaker D: Yes. And it's beautiful because they're so supportive of one another.
[00:34:32] Speaker A: Incredible. We're going to grab all that information from you and we'll put it on our if it's not one thing, it's Joanna Instagram account so that people know where to donate and also how to get in touch for those kinds of activities. Because I think it can be a lonely and sad world for caregivers who are navigating this and watching firsthand the decline of their family members. But you're right. When you can look at it as we're doing the best we can and we're also providing something really meaningful for them that helps us get through our days.
[00:35:07] Speaker D: Absolutely.
And you guys do an amazing job caring for Joanna. I'm so glad when I see families that or participants, they have that support of their families family that makes me so happy. That's another thing that makes my job much easier and lighter.
[00:35:23] Speaker A: Well, thank you. We appreciate it. It is most definitely a labor of love and I would imagine you feel that way every day with what you do. So thank you for joining us. Thank you for sharing the Brown center with us. And thanks for all that you do to make that such a worthwhile activity for family members.
[00:35:40] Speaker C: Thank you, Sherilyn. Really appreciate it.
[00:35:43] Speaker D: I appreciate it.
[00:35:45] Speaker C: All right, and we'll be right back. For now, enjoy the dulcet tones of mom as she plays us out of this segment.
[00:36:09] Speaker A: And you'll always have it when you're gonna do it again.
Somewhere over the rainbow skies are true and we're back.
So what a great chat with Sherrilyn. What a delightful human being she is, as well as everybody we met who worked at the Brown Center. I do want to just share a quick story that you said that we heard about the Brown center when we were trying to find activities for Mom. But in fairness, Julie and I had known about Brown center for a long time. One, it's a big conversation in our community, but the other is that when dad started to decline and we were trying to keep him busy and socially engaged, we took him to the Brown center for a time. And at this time, he was still pretty much able to engage with people. He still kind of had, you know, some of his wittiness about him. Dad, unlike mom, was very much the participant and the, you know, very socially active with people. We had a joke that my dad could wear a shirt that said, tell me your life story. Because everywhere he went, everybody wanted to talk to him, and he was a great listener, and he was a great conversationalist. And, I mean, everybody knew him, from people at the post office to the dry cleaner to the pharmacist. I was always really proud when people would say, are you Dr. Edelson's daughter? He was a professor at Wayne State and had a real command of the room with all of his students. So when we signed him up for the Brown center, he thought, in his relatively demented state, that he was in charge, that he was running the program. So we would bring him, and they would say that they enjoyed it, and it was funny, but, like, if there were materials to pass out, he would call on people and say, can you pass these out to people? Or he would, you know, walk around the room asking people questions. He sort of just felt like it was a class that he was teaching, and it was really lovely. He actually participated in the Brown center quite a few times until he had a fall, which ultimately led to his end. But it was really kind of sweet that he loved it to the point where he thought he was in charge.
[00:38:35] Speaker B: And I know this really doesn't have much to do with anything, but I do want to tell this story about dad because it also relates to dad and you.
And at one point, after he had had some surgery and he was in rehab and still kind of probably recovering from the drugs. And at the time, your husband, who.
[00:38:56] Speaker C: Was a doctor.
[00:38:59] Speaker A: My former husband, we wanted to call.
[00:39:01] Speaker B: It was always our first call if anything happened, if we bruised our knee or something. And so he gets a call from you with absolute panic in your voice, like you Gotta get over here. Please. There's. Something's wrong with dad. And so he rushes over, and he walks into the room at the rehab place, and you're there looking frightful. Dad is sitting in a chair reading a newspaper, and Avery looks at you, and he's like, I don't understand. I thought you said there was a big emergency here. He looks perfectly fine to me. And the next thing that happens is dad crumbles up the newspaper and starts to eat it.
[00:39:36] Speaker A: Not a usual act for him. Also probably not delicious.
[00:39:39] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:39:40] Speaker B: And then Avery's like, okay, I get. Maybe something's going on. Anyway, he recovered fine from that. That was earlier. But just again, sometimes tragic events can be a little bit funny. And hope you got a little kick out of that one.
[00:39:50] Speaker A: Yeah, we also like that it was the New York Times. Like, dad would have probably not munched on a local paper, but he really.
He liked a good intellectual read. It was delicious.
[00:40:01] Speaker C: Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. And back to the Brown Center.
[00:40:04] Speaker B: It's just such an amazing place. And Sherrilyn, you know, when you meet Sherrilyn and you see the great work that she's doing, you're reminded how many special people are in this senior care world. I mean, she's clearly meant for this work and has just an absolutely wonderfully compassionate DNA that shines through and makes.
[00:40:23] Speaker C: All her campers feel great.
[00:40:25] Speaker B: And we just really want to stress that.
[00:40:27] Speaker A: Yeah, for sure. You know, it's one of the pieces. And what led us to Brown center and other activities we'll discuss in future pods is that we do want our mom to be busy, engaged, active, like anybody who's caring for a loved one with dementia. And we are always on the search for what's out there. What can we send her to? What can we research? What can we share with our listeners? We find a lot in the Jewish community because, you know, obviously, that's where we're most connected. We know lots of people in our world who will say, oh, you should try this, or have you thought of this? And we also know that the Jewish community thrives on taking care of one another, and so they do offer a lot of these activities. But it's important to note, and we did bring this up with Sherrilyn, that you do not have to be Jewish to be a participant at the Brown Center. So if you're in the metro Detroit area and you're looking for good activities for your loved ones, by the way, affordable ones, I should add, I think that the Brown center could be a good fit for anybody. But we also are curious and we've started to do a lot of research in this area.
Are there other activities out there that are important in other communities? Are there churches or different kinds of religious groups who do these kinds of things for their own community? And so we're pursuing a lot of those. But we obviously would love suggestions from our listeners.
If you have suggestions for activities that we should feature or ones that we should research, we'd love to hear from you again. Our email address is ifitsnot1gmail.com.
Obviously, we'll take all comments, suggestions, questions, anything that you have. But specifically, if you know of resources that we haven't tapped into or that you think would be a good fit for the pod, we'd love to know about those. And of course, we'll continue to do our due diligence to find resources in every community that will help people to create meaningful lives for their loved ones. And that includes other states as well. We know that we're Detroit based, but this has got to exist in other places. We would love to know what are you doing with your loved ones? What do you recommend? What could you share with other people that would be really vital to the success of their care?
[00:42:43] Speaker B: We certainly would like to know that.
And that's gonna be a wrap for this episode. Thanks everyone for joining. We hope it was worthwhile. And here's mom to play us out.
[00:43:02] Speaker A: On the street where you're living today.
And that's where you're gonna be doing, doing it tomorrow in the universe for the next day on the street where you live.
